“The connection is the high. That’s really what everybody’s chasing, that high. Because when you finally feel like you’re a natural part of something, it’s like finding your roots.
— Rocky A$AP —
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Hello and my very best to you and yours.
Thank you so much for the supportive messages regarding my book officially being available for pre-order. It was a real thrill to hear from so many of you and I can't wait until it's released into the wild on July 16th.
If you missed last week’s message, you can check out the description and what early readers have said about it on the link below.
Shy by Design
12 Timeless Principles to Quietly Stand Out
If you think your community would benefit from its message and insights, I'd love you forever if you shared it far and wide.
Here are three things that I’ve been thinking about over the last few days that I’m excited to share with you (along with a free storytelling guide at the end of the message).
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on owning your lane
For most of the master's courses I teach, my friend Kevin Kelley, co-founder of the award-winning strategy design firm Shook Kelley and author of Irreplaceable, gives a guest talk outlining his 12 principles for how to get a seat at the leadership table.
Whether they want to be entrepreneurs, creators, or work corporate, I can see lightbulbs go off over my student’s heads when he asks them one question —
“Are you a starter, a developer, or a finisher?”
- Starters are great filling out an initially blank page with ideas.
- Developers shine when helping starters pressure-test and advance their ideas.
- Finishers thrive when packaging up ideas.
Though simple, it’s a great question to gain clarity on where you can make the biggest impact.
I’m an okay starter but I’m not the person to ask about the details that come along with being a finisher.
My strength is being an idea developer. I have a knack for catching up to what starters are thinking and helping them to distill, crystallize, and amplify their thoughts before passing them off to a finisher. This is a big reason why I write stories and books with people and not for them. I need them to get their initial ideas down before I can rip them apart.
Which are you? A starter? A developer? A finisher?
The beauty of this question is it allows you to find your lane while also giving you clarity on your ideal collaboration partners to create a team that is collectively built on individual strengths.
Like Kevin once told me —
“Innovation is an act of extreme collaboration. The better people are at owning their lane, the stronger the outcome will be.”
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on pouring all your heart into your art
I’m a big fan of listening to actor Shai Lebouf tell stories and riff on just about any topic under the sun (his interview on The Real Ones podcast is a personal favorite).
But I get really excited when Lebouf dives into art and what it takes to be an artist.
Here’s what he said in the documentary about Kid Cudi entitled My Name is Scott (another personal favorite as Cudi is honest).
“What makes an artist is fully investing your heart.
That’s all it takes.
So, if you don’t give a fuck, why invest your heart?
I feel like the best artists have that drive that they feel like they need to do it to be able to survive, but also this confidence that the people on the other side need this shit; that in sharing this with people healing can happen — not just for the person making the shit, but for the person receiving the shit.
And in that connection, that’s where art is.
It’s in that full investment of heart on both sides.”
I don’t know about you but I love that. Many people today lead with how they can get theirs instead of seeking to build a bridge with their art that connects human hearts.
When thinking about Shai’s words today, my friend Kaki Okumura came to mind.
If you aren’t familiar with Kaki’s work, she’s a beautiful Japanese writer who does all of her own illustrations. I feel like whenever I read anything from Kaki — it’s heart-driven.
Last year, she published her first book — Wa: The Art of Balance — Live Healthier, Happier and Longer the Japanese Way — and consists of 4 pillars: Nourish, Move, Rest, Socialize.
If you're interested in personal growth but prefer practical instead of over-the-top, give Kaki's book a shot. The Move section alone was worth the purchase for me. Her exercises and advice have improved my flexibility in just ten minutes a day of stretching.
Order your copy here
Wa
The Art of Balance
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on validation
Speaking of my book coming out. Until recently, phrases like “I can’t wait for it to be released into the wild” were not part of my vocabulary. If you had asked me six months ago to describe my internal churn, “Scared Shitless!” would have been said often and violently.
But that changed when I let the book sit for 90 days and read it in one sitting from front to back. When I was finished, I immediately thought to myself with immense pride — “Wow, I made that!”
Who knows if the book will be well-received? That’s for the outside world to decide. I’m sure it won’t resonate with everyone and a few people will leave less than stellar reviews. I’m not entirely sure that I’ll greet the inevitable criticism that comes with putting yourself out into the world with a wide smile. But writing this message this morning while my kids and wife get a few more hours of sleep, I kinda think I will.
I pushed through and did something I never thought I could do. Some stranger on the internet or even a family member’s opinion will not change that.
What’s something hard that you want to face in your life?
The thing you’re avoiding but dying to do?
It took me way too long to learn this, but confidence and self-worth don’t only come from getting things right — they also come from taking pride in knowing you tried.
Validation is an inside game.
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Free personal storytelling guide
As promised last week, below is a free guide to writing personal stories. It houses six of my foundational tips to keep readers hooked on your stories from start to finish without relying on tricks and gimmicks.
If you know anyone who would benefit from the guide, feel free to forward them this message or send them the link.
Stand Out Stories: Six Foundational Tips
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That's it for this week.
Keep an eye out for a message next Thursday.
Until then, be good to yourself and others.
Onwards,
Michael
PS: If you enjoyed this message, the greatest thanks I can get is you sharing it with your community and encouraging your friends and family to sign up for these weekly messages.
here’s a link to make that easy
And if you're new here, feel free to cruise past editions.